Sunday, May 4, 2014

Fun at the hardware store

So, I wanted to share my somewhat humerous experiences at the hardware store today.  Several select people know that I'm building a pigeon loft.  Those people are the ones that have come to my basement and been like, "oh, you have pigeons!"  Otherwise, you really don't know.

Anyway, so its like a chicken coop, but designed for pigeons.  So, up til this point, I was building it in my garage, but it got to the point today where, if I was to connect the front and the back in my garage... there would be no getting it out of the garage without help (which you would totally understand if you saw the amount of stuff in my garage at the moment).... and my ability to convince people to come and help me with this stuff is sort of lacking.  Ok, in reality, most of my friends live too far to ask them, so mostly it's just me, with no help.   

So, I took it outside.  I cut a few things that I needed, and attached the front to the back outside.  I had thought ahead and had purchased some corner braces to help keep this all together.  Well, somehow my head had worked out that there'd only be four corners, instead of 8.  Oops.  So I put on what I could and got as much worked out as possible.  Attached front to back.  Put up support in front and back.  Put up side supports.  Attached these all with nails and braces.  Well, then I was at that point where I really couldn't do anything else without purchasing other items.

So, I went to Home Depot cause I needed to pick up some more 2 x 4's, so shelving for the inside of the loft, and a few other random things.  Got everything I needed (or so I thought), and I had a lot of 8' wood on one of those wood carts that is huge.  So there was no going through self-checkout.  Well, it seems that, at least in the times I've been there, Home Depot thinks most people can self-checkout, so there's only one other cashier.  And if I have just small items and no wood, I will use self-checkout.  But not with a cart full of wood.

So I go up to the one cashier, who happened to be counting the money in the drawer and was having issues with it.  I wasn't sure what was going on, but 10 minutes later, she's still counting, and I'm starting to get impatient.  Finally she called over management who told her, worry bout the money later, take care of the customer first.  Smart management.

Anyway, so I know that I had 5 of the 2 x 4's, I had 6 of the 1 x 2's, I had two 1 x 12 x 8", and four 1 x 8 x 6'.  So I tell her that.  And I don't expect her to look em up, but if I say I have 6 of this item... the typical employee types in "6" and scans the item.  Or at least counts the item and then puts in "6" and scans one.  Nope, she apparently didn't believe me, and scanned everything one by one.  Which was fine, I didn't have that many items.  But then she got back to the screen and looked and wasn't sure she got everything.  So she went back and counted everything several times just to be sure.  So finally we get to the point where I'm ready to pay.  I swipe my card.  She asks to see ID.  Now.... my order was under $100.  It was large pieces of cheap wood.  If I stole someone's debit card, I sure would go and purchase more "fun" items.  Even Home Depot has more fun items that I would purchase if I had someone else's card.

Anyway, that's beside the point.  She apologized several times about taking so long, and really I wasn't in a huge rush, but I was kinda happy I don't typically get someone like that.

So I go home, put more of the loft together.  It starts getting dark and so I stop cutting the wood and start putting together what I have.  Finally it's dark enough I'm not going to get much accomplished without some light source, and I'm not looking to get eaten by bugs, so I call it a night.  And I realize, the sander I bought is apparently only useful to sand dead skin cells off someone's feet.  I apparently bought a polishing sander, not what I intended.  So I figured, I needed a few more things, I could go back.  Let's note, that this was at least 4-5 hours after I was there the first time (and I live not even 5 minutes from Home Depot, so it's not a drive).

So, last thing I do before I leave is measure the loft so I can get the plywood cut.  Before I leave the house, I take the spare tire / donut out of my vehicle to give me more room for the plywood.  So I get to the store and exchange my sander and get a clamps for the tarp.  Finally find someone to cut the plywood. Very nice, asks what I'm making, and we talk a bit.  The one piece of plywood was cut to 46".  Well, that's almost a full sheet.  So the convo goes like this:

Him:  what kind of vehicle do you have?

Me:  SUV

Him:  Large?

Me:  Small

Him:  This gonna fit?

Me:  Oh yeah

Him:  You sure?

Me:   I measured before I left

Him:  Okay.  (in that disbelieving tone)

Ok so we get to the checkout.  And who's there but my favorite cashier!  The same one from earlier. So, she rings me up considerably faster at this point in time, and made a comment about how she's happy to see me back after how long I waited last time.  I told her, it wasn't that bad, and she seemed happy.  If I'd had my phone the first time, it wouldn't have been so bad, I would have at least amused myself.  Anyway.   

Ok, so we get the plywood outside and I pull up my blazer under the contractor roof so we can load.  Another guy comes out to help load.  It's three sheets of plywood, I think I could have done it myself, but you know.  So I open the back and

Them:  This isn't gonna fit.

Me:  It's gonna fit.

Them:  Uh.....yeah.

Me:  I measured this at home, it's gonna fit.

**both guys stand there, looking at me heavily skeptical**

Me:  It's gotta go in at an angle.  This isn't a pick-up bed, there's not room to lay it down flat.  So it needs to angle up to this side *motions* and it'll fit

**still looks skeptical, but one guy lifts up the biggest piece**

....and it fit.

The guys that were there were super nice, so I just thanked them and left, but had it been anyone else, I was secretly dying to say that I KNEW it would fit.  I'm not usually the told-ya-so type, but this would have been the perfect instance for that.

Anyway, so I get home, and there's some lightning, and I think, ok I better get that tarp on before it pours.  So I stand up the loft, get the tarp over, and use the newly purchased clamps to hold it down.  Get inside, and it starts pouring.  Awesome timing.  Lol.


No comments:

Post a Comment