Weird weird people

So, if you've read these blog posts with any regularity, you probably have caught on that I get a lot of weird calls, texts, and emails, which I imagine is due to the fact that my phone number is all over the internet due to the chinchilla ads and gecko ads and website and all that fun stuff.

This one takes the cake though.

Got a text:

Them:  Hey, what's up?
Them:  Here's my new number.
Them:  Delete my old one
Them:  Save this one

Maybe it's just me... but when my friends change phone numbers, they tend to start it with, "hey, this is Angie..."  Because otherwise... I mean.... even for people who are legitimately my contacts, I have at least 70...

Me:  Who is this?

Them:  This is Chris
Them:  How are you?
Them:  I'm bored

Should mention... the only Chris I know (other than maybe adopters over the years... and I don't regularly keep in contact with any Chris's) is my mother.  And she didn't change phone numbers over the weekend so...

Me:  Chris who?

Them:  I need help making a decision
Them:  Should I change my number again?
Them:  I keep getting bizarre texts from the person's friend who had this # before me
Them:  Take a listen to this as an example
Them:  *sends some sort of file*

Me:  Go away

(honestly... re-read the part above about "I don't know any Chris's" (and my mom wouldn't text me and say... "this is Chris,"... it's somehow a scam or a virus or whatever)

Them:  What?!?!?

Me:  The only Chris I know is my mom.  I'm not listening to a file from a random person and I know my mom didn't change her number

....and the #1 way you know it's some scam rather than someone who really thinks they know me...

Them:  Go fuck yourself
Them:  I don't have time for your shit
Them:  Thanks for nothing "Friend"
Them:  Go burn in hell for eternity
Them:  Suck on Satan's cock

Holy shit, what?  So I text them:

Me:  So tell me who you are, if you're such a good friend.  What's your last name?

Them:  Danielson

Me:  I'm telling you, I don't know you.  You must have the wrong number

Them:  Oh no.
Them:  Well will u still give me advice
Them:  Should I report that audio message to the police?

Me:  I'm not listening to it.  I mean no offense but it could be a virus or something

Them:  Up yours

Cause you know, when you text a random stranger and they won't listen to a random message you send them... you should totally say all sorts of nasty things to them.  That will TOTALLY endear them to you and make them want to help you.  And this is the fun stuff I get to deal with.  Until the next time...